has gained some perspective on how all her demons coincide, as she explained on Ashley Graham’s podcast, “Pretty Big Deal,” that eventually, relapsing from her eating disorder by over-exercising and heavily dieting would come to play a part in  Demi has been very open about her struggles with alcohol, cocaine, and Oxycontin addiction as well as bulimia, and she firther addressed all of these issues on Graham’s podcast on Tuesday.

“I’m tired of running myself into the ground with workouts and extreme dieting,” Demi expressed. “I thought the past few years was recovery from an eating disorder, when it actually was just completely falling into it. And I just realized that, like, maybe my symptoms weren’t as obvious as before, but it was definitely an eating issue.” Demi further explained how elements like her disordered eating habits as well as her toxic environment led to her overdose a year-and-a-half-ago, which nearly killed her.

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“I think when you have certain people around you that are telling you certain things, that you should look a certain way, it makes it harder. I was in that situation, and I was just running myself into the ground. And I honestly think that’s kind of what led to everything happening over the past year. [It] was just me thinking I found recovery when I didn’t, and then living this kind of lie and trying to tell the world I was happy with myself when I really wasn’t.”

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Demi spent two weeks in the hospital after nearly losing her life, before entering a long-term treatment centre. The singer made her comeback at the Grammys last month, where she performed her new song, “Anyone,” that  “[‘Anyone’] represented that period in my life when everything hit the fan,”  “I thought if I ever come back from this—I was in the hospital, I didn’t know—if I ever come back from this, if I end up going back to music and I’m onstage and I get a first performance, I want it to be at the Grammys and I want it to be this song.” Following her powerful Grammys moment, Demi had the honour of .